December 2010
I need
someone to talk to. I never thought it’d be this hard.
“From your parents you learn love and laughter and how to put one foot before the...”
– Helen Hayes
Day 2 - Myself in 10 years.
In ten years I am almost twenty-eight years old. Wow, that sounds so strange. I’m not sure where my life will take me, so I can’t really speculate on where I’ll be.
Wherever I am, I hope that I’m happy.
Married. Or close to that. That boy I spoke of finding in the first note? Yeah, hopefully I’ll have him in ten years. All mine. Maybe a family. Depending on where...
“I’m afraid so. You’re entirely bonkers. But I’ll tell you a secret. All the best...”
– Alice in Wonderland
Day 1 - Relationship status.
I am the definition of single. Not only am I commitment shy, I am also oddly picky. Well, maybe picky isn’t the correct word. I just don’t see the point in putting effort into someone who isn’t right for me. That’s probably why I am commitment shy too. I don’t want to be locked into anything, including a relationship.
I find reasons not to date people more often...
It's raining.
People are always looking at me. Analyzing me. They’re always trying to figure me out, trying to know why I am the way I am. I don’t appreciate it. I have no answers right now. I wish people would stop trying to find them all the time.
I'm trying
to be a better person. I’m trying to watch what I say. I’m trying remember that everyone is fighting some kind of battle. I’m trying not to get so caught up in my own life. I’m trying not to be selfish. I’m trying to show people kindness and love, in all situations. I’m trying.
Today marks the first day of new beginnings.
“No matter what happens in life, be good to people. Being good to people is a...”
I want.
A lot of things. It’s bad. I should appreciate what I do have. That’s a hard concept for a lot of people, so maybe I’m only human.
I want a boy who smells wonderful… all the time. And who won’t mind all my annoying qualities or the fact that I like weird things. He’ll like weird things with me. We won’t have to do much of anything together… watch...
There is a time
and a place, but in the end none of that really matters. The only things that mean anything are the people I meet along the way and the memories we make together. That’s all that ever really sticks. I am faced with this even more now. It makes me sad, to see everything changing. But I am okay with it because I know that right now is all that matters. Now. Now. Now.
words for thought
Is anyone listening? I will tell the truth here. Truth. Small word, big consequences. I’m good at the truth. Just not for anyone else to see. I keep it hidden away, in the spirals tucked beside my bed, filled with my handwriting and my voice. My voice. It’s so loud inside my own head, but incredibly quiet when faced with judgement. It’s a wonder how I plan to ever get anything I...